Addiction + Sound and Colour
Addiction
Art doesn’t even help
I don’t even want the void
I’d get bored being nothing
Wish I’d felt when I could still feel
I’m more alive than a rock
Less alive than an Android
What celestial bod? I’m no one
A cold sod
Bumpin around the asteroid belt
I’m sad – im fucked.
Ruined from Jordan Peterson to Jesus Christ
Meaningless from Jung to Freud
I feel something – I remember something
Oh yeah that’s right – it was nothing
Wondering if im human – if I cared – if I even could
If I even would
Last time I got wood
Crying and cumming to a fiction
Hate-fapping to an actor
Pretending the fuck was good
Pretending she was there
Pretending she was where she should
I write poems when im drunk
My depression – I try debunk
Who’d even thunk?
Infront of an audience, could mark the lowest that I’d sunk
Sound and Colour
I look out the window
the abyss stares back at me.
And the stars. A billion billion, a trillion trillion. Dancing their pointless dance and battling their pointless battles. Some blue, some red, all emitting waves beyond and below our wildest imaginations. The multiplicity, the infinite permutations.
Are we really alone?
My mind, always on the big questions. There are more pressing matters.
Where am I? How did we go so wrong? Was it my fault? Does any of it matter?
Back to the big questions. Perhaps that’s the only question that matters, does it matter?
Out here, in nowhere. Floating with everyone who survived; floating on my own.
A speck of dust twinkling in a ray of sunshine
in an abandoned house.
A beautiful idea
kept in the dark by an anxious mind and a hopeless heart.
A nothing
trudging through the emptiness of everything.
I am humanity’s greatest ambition; I am humanity’s greatest failure.
There is a God
but she made the universe as a joke
and the punchline never landed.